From Jodi: This is the first of a couple “letters to God” Dana shared with me. I pray there will be many more! What a joy to have Dana share this with me, and give me permission to share it with you. Please lift Dana in prayer!
I feel somewhat silly writing this letter, but quite frankly Lord I have no one else to write to or anyone else out there who cares. My Lord, I’m hurting so bad inside and I’m full of so much pain that I’m lost and don’t know what to do. God, I feel so full of despair and defeat but all the while I feel so overwhelmingly empty. Is it even possible to feel “FULL” of so many bad things but “EMPTY” of all the goodness I so long to feel??
I keep being told that I need to be patient, that you will reveal your perfect plan for me in due time, and I’m trying really hard Lord to stay positive and wait quietly for your divine light to shine upon the path which is to be my life. I keep trying to familiarize myself with your word, your teachings and find meaning in the Holy Bible, but sometimes Lord I just get lost in the pages no matter how hard I try to focus and pray. I try to remember to stay positive in my mind so that I might in turn have a positive tongue which may produce a positive life. I try to call upon guidance from the Holy Spirit to lead me through my day, especially when I feel scared and lost (which we both know is often) and although it brings me comfort, I still feel like there’s something missing, something I’m not doing right to praise you which would open up my spirit to fully receive your graciousness. I feel like everything I do is wrong, even when it comes to you O Lord.
Lord, let me please back up by saying Thank You for this day, regardless of where my day is being lived out. At least I’m alive, sober, safe and healthy, which is more than I can say about my previous situation. We both know that the “DARK SPIRIT” had me by the hand and was leading me on a path of turmoil straight to Hell. We both know that what I once considered living really wasn’t living at all, but merely dying with each passing day. We both fully know that if you hadn’t locked me up to slow me down, that only you know how much more time or how many more breaths I would have had. So Lord Jesus, please know that I am grateful that you saved my life that day.
I believe Lord that through you all things are possible and I believe Lord that as long as I have faith in you my life will bear the fruit of your love and I will live in your perfect plan. Please Lord Jesus, fill me with the Holy Spirit so that I can be happy along this wait. I give it all to you my Lord and I trust you will sort it all out for me. I have faith in your great goodness. Just please Lord give me the patience that I lack. Thank you O Lord for all you do and help me to see all the miracles (great or small) you have already bestowed upon me.
All my soul,